


Lost Her to Myself

by firecatwings



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-03-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 23:47:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22704184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/firecatwings/pseuds/firecatwings
Summary: Kara is in love with Lena. Lena is in love with Kara. The two of them are best friends, and will never be anything more than that... right? When Lena loses all hope for Kara, one night with Supergirl changes everything. Not knowing that Kara is Supergirl, she falls hard for the hero. How will Kara cope being in love with her best friend, while her friend is in love with her alter ego?
Relationships: Kara Danvers/Lena Luthor
Comments: 40
Kudos: 91





	1. Birthday Party Disaster

**Author's Note:**

> A/N hello beautiful readers! if you're coming from my last story, Favorite Little Hufflepuff/Favorite Little Superhero, yay! happy to have you here! if not, welcome to my crackhead writing. if you're from my last story though, you're probably aware of asexual kara. well, i decided not to have kara asexual in this. part of me really wanted to, but it fit better with the last story because she was a teenager when she discovered it, which was a big factor to her relationship with lena. but now, it's set in regular times. that being said, an adult discovering their asexuality is totally valid! i just don't really know how i would write it from an adult's perspective since i was 14 when i discovered my asexuality. so yes, the nasty will happen, but i will NOT write smut. unless you guys REALLY want me to, then i'll ask my friend to write something and then i'll copy and paste it. but yeah. hope you enjoy!!

"Supergirl," Lena said breathlessly. She let out a moan as their lips crashed together. 

"N-not in the living room," Lena managed to say in the very short break between kisses. The alien said nothing, but wanted to do whatever she could in order to touch Lena again. 

"Bedroom's this way," Lena whispered in a seductive voice, grabbing the alien's hand. 

She lead her down the hall, and barely managed to open the door before they were kissing again. Lena pulled her own shirt over her head, then tossed it on the floor. The two of them came crashing down onto the bed. 

"These stupid tights," Supergirl muttered, struggling to get them off. Lena chuckled, but soon got annoyed with how long it was taking. 

"Hurry up," she mumbled. Her voice did things to Supergirl, sending chills down her spine. After a few more failed attempts, she eventually got the tights to come off. They were soon followed by the skirt... then the cape and top. After some more rolling around, which ended with Supergirl on the top, they stared into each other's eyes for a minute.

"Are you sure?" Lena asked softly.

"Yes," she replied. "Are you?"

"Yes," Lena said breathlessly. Supergirl took a deep breath, preparing herself. Nothing would ever be the same again.

48 hours earlier

"Kara!" Lena greeted her best friend with a hug. 

"I've missed you so much!" Kara said, hugging her tighter.

"We just saw each other yesterday," Lena mentioned, laughing.

"Your point?" Kara asked, grinning widely. 

"I guess you can never get too much of your best friend," Lena replied. She mentally cringed for using those last words. She just plummeted herself even further into the friend zone. Kara silently felt a small pain in her heart. She had accepted that her and Lena would never be more than friends, but it still hurt whenever she was reminded of that.

"I have some doughnuts for us!" Kara said happily, changing the subject. She pulled out a bag she had just gotten and set them on the counter.

"Yes!" said Lena, pulling a blueberry doughnut out of the bag. Kara grabbed a chocolate doughnut which was completely covered in sprinkles, since she asked for extra. 

"You better not tell Alex that I got doughnuts before her birthday," Kara told her in a semi-secretive voice. Lena chuckled,

"Why? Is she worried about your sugar intake?" She asked. 

"No," Kara replied. "Well, sort of... she just wouldn't want me to eat doughnuts without saving at least one for her. And yes, she thinks I eat way too much sugar." Lena laughed,

"Well I guess you'll just have extra sugar then," she said, booping her nose. Kara scoffed,

"Did you just boop me?" She asked. Lena noticed some of the frosting on the side of her lip. She brought her hand up and slowly wiped it off,

"Yes," she said. "I did." 

Kara giggled, noticing how close they were. She looked down at Lena's lips, wanting nothing more than to brush them against her own. Lena could feel the butterflies building up in her own stomach and immediately backed away.

"So, uh," Lena said to attempt to break the awkward silence. "Have you picked out a gift for Alex for her party tomorrow?" 

"Yep," Kara replied. "I got her a necklace with a sister charm."

"Awe, that's sweet," Lena said. "I just got her an Amazon gift card. Do you think she'll like it?"

"Oh yeah," Kara replied. "Alex loves gift cards. Then she can buy the most embarrassing things for herself that no one will get for her." Both girls started laughing. 

"These doughnuts are really good," Lena commented as she bit into her third one.

"I know, right?" Kara said as she had just finished her fifth one. "You're the only person I know who appreciates doughnuts almost as much as me." Lena laughed,

"Well I'll have to eat a lot of kale later to make up for it. And of course I'll need to have a very long workout." She said. 

"I'll just cut out a little sugar by eating pizza," Kara said. Lena scoffed,

"How do you manage to eat so unhealthy without working out and not be 600 pounds?" She asked, laughing. Kara shrugged,

"I don't know. Just lucky, I guess," she replied, obviously not going to tell her the real reason. 

"Well, when you figure it out, please share your secret," Lena said, bringing her face close to Kara's. The butterflies came back again in both of them until Kara cleared her throat.

"So I guess I'll see you at Alex's party tomorrow then," Lena said in response. Kara nodded,

"Yeah," she said, trying to be enthusiastic. "See you then." The awkwardness between them only got bigger. 

"Do you wanna watch a movie?" Kara asked. She didn't want Lena to leave, but she also wanted to to get rid of all the awkward energy between them. 

"Sure," Lena answered. "What should we watch?" Kara walked to her living room and dug through the box of DVD's she had. 

"Here are some of the options," Kara told her. Lena walked over to look,

"Why don't we watch your favorite?" She suggested. Kara grinned brightly.

"Yay! I guess we're watching The Wizard of Oz then," she said.

"That's your favorite?" Lena asked. Kara nodded,

"Are you okay with watching it?" She asked.

"It's fine with me as long as you've got popcorn," Lena answered. "Despite the fact that we just had doughnuts."

"I'm on it," Kara replied, on her way to the kitchen to get out microwave popcorn. She made sure Lena wasn't watching, then used her heat vision on the bag, popping all the popcorn. 

"Here we are," she said, bringing a bowl of popcorn back into the living room. 

Lena had already put the disc in the DVD players and had to movie ready. Kara sat down next to her on the couch and placed the popcorn between them. She leaned a little closer and got ready to watch the movie as she pressed play. There was really nothing like loving someone you can't have.

"Where are all the balloons?" Kara yelled, holding her clipboard. She looked Brainy in the eye,

"Brainy, you were on balloon duty," she said in an intimidating voice.

"Yes," he replied, scared.

"Well people are supposed to arrive in 30 minutes. Where are the balloons?!" She asked.

"I'll get them!" He said, running off. He ran up to Nia and whispered,

"Kara is scary when it comes to party planning."

"I HEARD THAT!" Kara yelled. He gulped, 

"On my way to the balloon store!" He said, running out of the building. Sam walked up to Kara,

"Did you have to be so hard on him?" She asked.

"Yes!" Kara replied, irritated. "Alex is turning 30, and she needs to have an amazing party. It needs to be perfect. And I won't let anything get in the way of that." 

"Okay, but do you think that you can maybe take it down a notch?" Sam asked. Kara sighed,

"Fine," she said. "But Brainy still better have the balloons ready,"

"He will," Sam reassured her. "Now go take a breather." Kara nodded, then walked around the rest of the party place. They had rented out a small venue, but they would still have enough space with all of Alex's friends here. 

"Okay, everything looks good," she said aloud. 

"Glad to hear that," a familiar voice said, coming from behind her. Kara turned around,

"Lena!" She said. "You're here early!" 

"Yeah, I wanted to see you!" She replied, then added. "And of course see if you guys needed any help setting up."

"We have almost everything ready," Kara told her. "We would actually have everything ready if Brainy would actually do his job." Lena laughed,

"What happened this time?" She asked. Kara sighed,

"Apparently, Sam thinks I'm too strict of a party planner," she said. "I just may have gone off on Brainy for forgetting balloons." Lena scoffed,

"That's not being too strict at all," she told her. "You were just doing your job. Unlike him."

"Thank you!" Kara said in relief. "At least someone agrees with me," 

"Well of course someone has to be the brains here," Lena replied, then added. "Excluding Brainy." Kara laughed.

"So anyway, what sort of activities do you have planned?" Lena asked.

"Mostly just drinking and dancing. Alex might want to pretend she's turning 13 instead of turning 30 and play Truth or Dare." Kara replied honestly. 

"That'd be fun," Lena admitted. 

"Really?" Kara asked, shocked. 

"I don't know, I think it might be fun to play a childhood game mixed with drinks," Lena said slyly. Kara raised her eyebrows,

"Oh you meant fun with the drinking part," she said in realization.

"One day sooner or later, Kara, I'm going to figure out how to get you drunk," Lena told her in determination.

"Good luck with that one," Kara replied, then heard Alex's voice with her super hearing. "She's here."

They both walked back into the main entrance area and greeted Alex,

"Happy birthday!" Kara yelled, throwing confetti into the air. Alex laughed, then greeted everyone else at the party. Thankfully, Brainy was back in time with the balloons.

"Is everyone already here?" Alex asked. Kara nodded, looking around. Alex took this as a reason to slam down a shot. 

"Whoo!" She yelled as she slammed the empty glass against the bar counter. The music started playing as everyone made their way to the dance floor. 

"C'mon Kara," Lena encouraged. "Take a shot!"

"Yes! Drinks!" Winn said, already slurring his words. Kara shrugged, it's not like it would affect her anyway.

"Sure," she agreed. Lena slightly clapped as Kara downed a drink. Within a few minutes, Lena was already slurring her words, and Kara felt a little off too. 

"Hey, it's Truth or Dare time!" Alex said after the party had been going on for about an hour. Everyone drunkenly made their way over to the section with couches and places to sit.

"Who wants to go first?" Alex asked. Nia raised her hand,

"Alright Nia," Alex said. "Truth or dare?"

"Dare," she said with no hesitation.

"Let the person to your left draw anything on your face," Alex said. Nia looked next to her, and of course it was Brainy. He took out a marker and drew a cute smiley face. 

"Now let's go clockwise. So you get to ask Lena," Alex said.

"Okay," Nia replied. "Lena, truth or dare,"

"Truth," Lena replied.

"Hey," Winn drunkenly interrupted. "This would be more fun with the Truth Seeker! I always keep one with me!"

"Okay," Alex said. He got it out, then strapped it to Lena's arm.

"Alright," Nia started. "Who here would you most like to kiss?" Lena resisted hard against the Truth Seeker for this one. Eventually, she lost the battle and opened her mouth.

"K-" She couldn't finish because she was interrupted.

"Hold on," Kara said, getting up. "I need to go to the bathroom." It was really an excuse to go out as Supergirl, because she heard someone in the distance screaming for help. 

"Help me!" The voice cried. Kara was already flying after it. She followed the noise until she got to a park where someone was sitting on the bench, they were in no harm. Kara looked closer, and noticed they were watching a movie on an iPad.

"Of course," Kara muttered to herself. She flew back to Alex's party, and walked in through the front doors.

"Supergirl?" Lena asked as she walked in. "What are you doing here?" Kara looked down in shock as she noticed she never changed back into her Kara clothes. 

"What's happening?" She asked out loud, feeling her head getting fuzzy. Winn stumbled over to her and whispered in her ear.

"I may have put some of the alien alcohol in your drink. Oops." He said. Kara's jaw dropped. 

"I'm gonna use the bathroom," she said, planning on leaving the room to put on her regualr clothes before she did anything bad as drunk Supergirl.

"I have to go to the bathroom, too." Lena said, getting up. Kara sighed as she was followed. 

"You can go first," she told Lena.

"There are multiple stalls," Lena replied as she started to walk funny. Kara sighed again, then walked in, unsure of what to do. Lena opened one of the stall doors, then fell over. Kara raced over and caught her.

"Thank you, Supergirl," Lena said, looking up into her eyes. 

"Y-yeah," Kara replied, stuttering at herself having a giant crush on Lena. 

"Hey where's Kara?" Lena asked, slurring her words. "Didn't she go in the bathroom like 10 minutes ago?" Kara's mind was a little fuzzy, but she could still think straight for the most part.

"Uh, I think she got sick and went home," she lied.

"Oh," Lena replied. "Hey you should come to my place."

"What?" Kara asked. 

"Yeah, Alex said the party was supposed to go until 11. And now it's 11:30." She explained.

"What does that have to do with you getting home?" Kara asked. 

"I, uh..." Lena hesitated drunkenly.

"You know," Kara started. "I will take you back just to make sure you get back safe."

"Fly me home," she asked. Kara sighed,

"Fine." She agreed. Lena attempted to jump into Kara's arms before losing her balance. Eventually, Kara just picked her up bridal style. She walked back out through everyone half asleep on the couches,

"I'm gonna make sure she gets home safe. Bye everyone!" She said, flying out the door once again. This time, she flew to the familiarness of Lena's place. 

"Stay with me," Lena pleaded.

"What?" Kara asked, feeling her thoughts become foggy. Lena walked up and pressed her lips against Kara's.

"Supergirl," she said. "Stay with me."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N hope you liked the first chapter! i'm trying to make the chapters in this a little longer, cuz i want at least 100,000 words for this. anyway, for the new people, i have a tradition of doing an annoying question thing at the end of each chapter, where i state the question, then my answer, and you guys can answer too! (if you want)
> 
> Q: what was your favorite childhood tv show?
> 
> A: sam&cat


	2. Explanations

"Supergirl?" Lena asked, waking up with a start. 

"Lena?" Kara asked, waking up. She looked around the room as memories started flooding back into her head. 

"What the-" Lena said aloud, noticing the fact that neither of them had any clothes on. 

"I'm sorry, I need to change," Kara said, quickly changing back into her Supergirl suit. She didn't want there to be any chance that Lena could recognize her to be Kara. 

"You're really wearing those tights at 8 o'clock in the morning?" Lena asked, chuckling. She had her head rested on her arm while she was still lying down.

"Uh, yeah," Kara replied, pulling the top over her head. "I didn't exactly bring anything else here..."

"If you want, you can wear something of mine," Lena offered. Kara couldn't accept, Lena might realize who she is.

"I'm sorry, I can't." Kara replied, then felt all her emotions hitting her. "Wait... why are you acting so normal?" Lena shrugged,

"I remember most of last night," Lena said. "I remember wanting you to take me home, and then I remember... this." She gestured to her naked body. Kara felt her face turning red, but she said nothing.

"Besides," Lena continued on. "We're both two consenting adults. We weren't that drunk. And I'm not currently in a relationship..." she looked away when she said that last part. 

"I'm not either," Kara admitted, but she wasn't sure how to feel about it. Yes, she just spent a night with the woman she was in love with, but it wasn't as herself. It was as Supergirl.

"I'll go make breakfast, and then you can get onto saving the day," Lena said enthusiastically. "Or whatever you do in your life when you're not Supergirl." Kara had to lie,

"I don't have a life where I'm not Supergirl," she lied. Hopefully that lie would prevent Lena from ever knowing who she really was.

"I don't believe that," Lena said, getting out of bed. Kara looked away as Lena changed to attempt to stop herself from blushing. 

"Well it's the truth," Kara lied again. Once Lena was dressed in a hoodie and sweats, she walked into the kitchen where Kara followed her.

"If you have no other life, then why have you only been known for the last few years?" Lena asked. "I assume that you've been alive longer than how long you've been here for... unless five year old's on Krypton look like 25 year old's here." 

"Nope, they still look like normal babies," Kara replied.

"Well, then you had to have some sort of life here before you become Supergirl. Otherwise, you'd have just been nonexistent until you become Supergirl," Lena explained.

"Who says I wasn't nonexistent?" Kara asked. Lena scoffed,

"Trust me, Supergirl, with your looks, you can't be nonexistent." She shamelessly stared at Kara. 

"Okay then," Kara said. "Well who's to say I didn't stop living my normal life when I became Supergirl."

"I'll never know the answer to that," Lena replied, getting eggs out. "I only moved here a year after you became Supergirl, so I wouldn't know of your life before then." 

"Do you need any help with those?" Kara offered, gesturing to the rest of the breakfast items Lena was getting ready. 

"I'm all right, thank you Supergirl," Lena said, then paused. "There is something else you can do for me."

"What is it?" Kara asked.

"What's your name?" Lena asked. Kara was taken aback,

"I-" she hesitated.

"Well, I'm literally making you breakfast the morning after you spent the night here. I think I deserve to be able to call you something other than your hero name, don't you think?" Lena told her. 

Kara thought for a minute. She obviously couldn't tell Lena her actual name. But she was right, she deserved to know something other than her hero name. 

"Zorel," Kara said suddenly. 

On Krypton, she was Kara Zor-El. If she combined the two parts of her Kryptonian last name, it was Zorel. 

"Zorel?" Lena asked, somewhat surprised.

"Well, I can say that I had a life on Krypton before I became Supergirl. That's what I was called, on Krypton." Kara explained. 

"Alright then, Zorel," Lena said. "How would you like your eggs?"

"Scrambled works for me," Kara replied. "But are you sure you don't want any help?"

"I was planning on making bacon too, you can help with that if you'd like." Lena told her.

Kara walked over to the refrigerator and pulled out bacon strips. She held each of them individually, then used her heat vision to cook them.

"What the-" Lena said surprised, then saw what Kara was doing. "T-that works too, I guess." Kara places the strips of bacon on the plates that Lena had out.

"Here you go," she said.

"Perfect timing," Lena replied. She turned the stove off as the eggs finished cooking. She scooped them onto each plate.

"For you, Zorel." Lena said, handing her one of the plates. The two of them walked to the small table and sat down. 

"Well, this has been interesting," Kara said bluntly. 

"Do you regret it?" Lena asked. Kara shook her head with no hesitation,

"Not at all," she said.

"Good," Lena replied. "Because I don't either." 

"And you're sure there's no one else?" Kara asked. "I don't want to be the other person."

"I'm single, Zorel." Lena said sternly, then paused for a moment. "Well, I guess I did have feelings for a friend. But I don't even think they would ever see me as anything more than a friend, so I'm moving on." Kara's face dropped.

"So that's what last night was? You getting over your friend?" She asked. 

"Not exactly," Lena replied. "What was it for you, anyway?" Kara sighed,

"I'm not sure," she admitted. "Was it a mistake?"

"No," Lena said right away. "I don't think it was a mistake at all. Definitely unexpected, but not a mistake." 

"Good," Kara replied. They made eye contact and shared a deep smile. The rest of their breakfast wasn't that awkward. 

"Well," Kara said after they had both finished, and had a lot of small talk. "I probably should get going." 

"Right," Lena said in understanding. "You have to get on with saving people and stuff,"

"Yup," Kara replied.

"Come back here, tonight," Lena asked her. "Please." Kara sighed,

"Okay," she agreed hesitantly. Lena pulled her in for a kiss,

"See you later, Zorel." She said. Kara was still in shock, but she kissed her back.

"Y-yeah," she said after they pulled apart. "See you." And with that, she made her way to the balcony and flew off. She went straight to the DEO.

"What the hell happened last night?" Alex asked as she arrived. Kara looked away awkwardly,

"Uhhh," she said in a squeaky voice.

"Kara?" Alex asked sternly.

"I was just... tired," she lied. "Winn did something to my drink, so after I dropped Lena off. I just went right to sleep."

"Why don't I believe you?" Alex asked. Kara blushed,

"I don't know," she said, still in the squeaky voice. "Maybe you hit your head on something." Alex glared, then got up in her face.

"I think it's you who got hit in the head if you think you can lie to me and expect me not to know," she said. Kara felt extremely intimidated and scared, then sighed.

"Well, uh," she hesitated. Alex motioned for her to continue.

"You know... maybe this wouldn't be the best place to talk about it," Kara said, her voice going even higher.

"I know you're stalling, Kar," Alex said. "But let's go to the balcony then."

"Fine," Kara agreed. She tried to walk as slow as she could, but Alex just sped walked up the stairs and out to the balcony. Kara used her super vision and hearing to make sure they were alone. 

"Okay," Alex said. "I'd really like to know what's going on now," Kara took a long, deep, slow breath in. Then a long, deep, slow breath out.

"So last night, like I just said, Winn put something in my drink that made me drunk," she started, Alex nodded. "And Lena got pretty drunk too... then I took her home. I was thinking that it would just be me taking her home because she was drunk, and I didn't want her to hurt herself driving." Alex scoffed,

"She was probably in even more danger with you flying around drunk while carrying her," she said, laughing.

"I made sure to be extremely careful! Winn's drink didn't effect my flying when I thought someone was in danger and I flew out. I just felt a bit dizzy, that's all." Kara defended. Alex laughed again,

"Okay, then," she said sarcastically. Kara sighed in frustration, then continued explaining to Alex what had happened. "So basically, I took her home. I thought I would just leave then and there, and the whole thing would be over. But then she..."

"She what, Kara?" Alex, enticed in what Kara was telling her, about also annoyed with how long it was taking her.

"She kissed me," Kara said. Alex raised her eyebrows,

"Really?" She asked. "Did you kiss back?" Kara felt her face turning red.

"Wow," Alex said, shocked. Kara had never told anyone about her feelings for Lena. As far as the world knew, she was completely and 100% heterosexual.

"Yep..." Kara said, her face as red as a tomato.

"I thought I was the gay sister," Alex said, laughing.

"You are," Kara replied swiftly. "I'm the bi sister" Alex smiled,

"Well, I obviously support you," she said. "So what happened after you guys kissed?" Kara somehow got even more red,

"We, uh, went to her room and... did it." She said in an awkward, squeaky voice. Alex's eyes widened,

"You and Lena had sex last night," Alex said, sounding shocked but also bursting into laughter. Kara shushed her,

"Don't be so loud!" She whisper shouted. Alex laughed some more,

"I never would have thought," she said. "So are you guys like friends with benefits now?" Kara sighed,

"Supergirl is the one who slept with Lena last night. It wasn't me," she said, then added. "Well, it was me. But it wasn't Kara."

"So would that make Supergirl Lena's friend with benefits?" Alex asked her.

"I don't know," Kara said.

"Or... do you guys have romantic feelings for each other?" She asked. Kara sighed again,

"I'm in love with her, Alex," she admitted. "I have been, for awhile now. I don't think she feels the same way. While I was there as Supergirl, she said that she did have feelings for someone, but was getting over them. I bet she was talking about James. They did break up awhile ago, but I but she still likes him." Kara groaned.

"I doubt that," Alex replied. "But you can't keep doing this with her. At least not as Supergirl,"

"I know," Kara said. "It's not fair to her, because she doesn't know who I really am. And if she knew that I was Supergirl, last night probably wouldn't have happened."

"Exactly, if you want to keep lying to her about your identity, you do that. But you can't lie to her about it and also sleep with her while you're Supergirl. It's just not fair to her." Alex explained. Kara nodded,

"I'll go over there right now and tell her," she said.

"You can't go right now," Alex argued. "We need you here at the DEO, what if there's an attack?"

"I can't just have this on my mind all day. I need to go to her now. I'm sure Nia can handle any superhero-ing National City needs today." Kara said. Alex hugged her,

"Let me know how it goes," she said.

"I will," Kara replied, hugging her for a little longer. And with that, she flew off from the balcony and made her way back to Lena's apartment. 

"Lena?" She asked, flying onto her balcony.

"Back so soon, are we?" Lena asked, smiling. Kara felt her heart sink,

"I need to talk to you about something," she said. 

"Well come in, then," Lena said. Kara sighed, as she entered the same apartment she had left just this morning. Lena sat down on the couch, and motioned for Kara to join. She complied, and instantly felt her stomach get nervous.

"Before you say anything," Lena said, she leaned in and pressed her lips against Kara's. 

Kara knew that she shouldn't, but she kissed back. In fact, she made the kiss deeper and more passionate than Lena probably intended. When she pulled away, they exchanged a smile that gave Kara the feeling that everything was gonna be okay.

"So, Zorel," Lena said. "What would you like to talk to me about?" Kara sat there in silence, staring at Lena's lips but also thinking about her conversation with Alex.

"You know what," she said. "It doesn't matter."

"Good," Lena replied, taking her hand. "Then let's go back to my room..." Her voice became flirtatious.

Kara instantly popped up, and off they went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N did i make an entire spanish project completely about supercorp? yes i did. do i regret it? no i do not
> 
> Q: what book have you re-read more than any other
> 
> A: the entire harry potter series


	3. Changes That Need to be Made

"Never thought I'd be able to say that I slept with Supergirl multiple times in 24 hours," Lena said, stroking her hand down Kara's bare back. She smiled,

"And I never thought I'd hear you say that," she replied. The two giggled at each other. 

"So," Kara started, changing the subject. "Would you say you're over the person now?" Lena thought about it. Even though Supergirl had gone behind her back before, that was before this. Before Lena knew she was Zorel. It had only been a day, but there was just something about her. And she was sure Kara would never like her as more than a friend at this point

"Yes," Lena said to her. "I am over them,"

"Good," Kara replied, grinning widely. Kara thought for a minute. On the bright side, that meant that Lena was over James. But she didn't like Kara... she liked Zorel. She'd have to tell her eventually, but she couldn't do it now. They'd now spent two nights together, and they were both really happy. 

"Are you sure you don't want to wear something of mine?" Lena asked her, laughing. "Don't get me wrong, I love your super suit, but don't you have to wash it?"

"Well yeah, but I can do that later," Kara replied. "I'll just put it on for now,"

"I'd be happy to let you wear something of mine," Lena said. "Really, it'd be fine." Kara sighed,

"It's fine, Lena," she said.

"I kind of want you to," Lena admitted.

"Why?" Kara asked, surprised. She shrugged, then slightly blushed,

"I guess it's 'cause I've only ever seen you wear your super suit, or wear nothing," she replied. "This still feels surreal to me, and I just thought it'd be nice if I could see you in something normal." 

Kara frowned, if she wore Lena's clothes, it could make her recognizable as Kara. But at the same time, she could understand how Lena felt.

"Are we the same size though?" Kara asked, trying to think of an excuse.

"Why don't we find out?" Lena replied. "I'll go get one of my shirts,"

"Wait!" Kara yelled, stalling.

"What?" Lena asked.

"I need to go," she lied. Lena frowned,

"Super hero stuff?" She asked.

"Yeah," Kara replied, going along with it. "I just heard someone, I need to go."

"Okay," Lena said in understanding. Sure, she was a little disappointed, but she had to remember that she had to be Supergirl too.

"Come back please," Lena asked her as she started to get her suit on. "Tonight,"

"Of course," Kara replied, "It's a date." 

"A-a date?" Lena asked, surprised. Kara smiled, then zoomed out the balcony. There wasn't anyone who actually needed saving, she just wanted an excuse to get out of Lena's apartment. She flew straight to the DEO. She wasn't needed there at the moment, just wanted somewhere to be.

"Hey, Kara," Alex greeted her as she arrived. Kara felt guilt spread all over her body. Alex wouldn't approve of what she was about to tell her.

"Balcony," Alex said firmly, reading the look on Kara's face. She felt herself turning red, then followed her sister outside.

"You didn't call last night," Alex replied. "I actually haven't heard from you since you left the DEO yesterday afternoon." Kara stared off into the distance, thinking about what she did after the she left yesterday.

"I feel like we had this exact same conversation yesterday," Alex said quietly. Kara sighed,

"Okay," she said. "I did go to Lena's yesterday to tell her that we couldn't continue whatever this is."

"Why do I feel like that's not the end of the story?" Alex replied. Kara bit her lip, frustrated with how well her sister knew her. 

"It's not," Kara admitted. Alex sighed,

"Continue," she said, taking in a deep breath. 

"And I swear I was going to tell her that we couldn't continue this. That it was just a one time thing... but I didn't," she explained. Alex groaned,

"Kara..." she said.

"I know! It's terrible! And then I spent the rest of the day at her place and also spent the night again." She replied.

"Did you guys-" Alex started to ask, but was then interrupted.

"We did." Kara interrupted, knowing what she was about to ask. She let out a deep sigh, then said. "Three times." Alex choked on her own spit.

"What?" She asked. She had a feeling that Kara was going to say that she had done it with Lena yet again, but she didn't expect her to say that it was three times.

"Please say something," Kara said, as red as a tomato. "I know it's not gonna be good but you saying nothing is worse,"

"I'm just, surprised," Alex said, wide eyed. "Yesterday, I just found out that you like girls and today I'm hearing about you doing it three times with one person,"

"Well technically four times if you count after your birthday party," Kara said under her breath, laughing.

"Oh god," Alex replied. The two girls looked at each other and then burst into laughter.

"I never thought this would happen, either," Kara told her.

"Well, I'm not going to tell you whether or not to be with her. But do whatever you think is right," Alex said firmly, changing her tone and the subject.

"Okay," Kara agreed. "I know what I need to do," 

"Good," Alex replied, giving her a nod.

With that, Kara walked back into the DEO. 

"Winn!" She said brightly as she found her friend. He was just the person who she was looking for,

"Oh, hey Kara," he replied.

"Can I, uh, ask you a favor?" Kara asked.

"Yeah sure, anything," he said.

"Do you have any easily removable, easy to hide, contact lenses?" She asked. "Not any that would drastically change my eye color, but just something so my eyes can be a different color when I'm Supergirl versus when I'm Kara," 

"I can work something up to perfectly fit your eyes," he said to her. Kara smiled,

"Thank you so much!" She said. "And do you think you can also make something that could change my voice? But not attached to my outfit or anything, something that could make my voice different even if I didn't have any clothes to hide wires." Winn thought for a minute,

"Yeah, I can do it," he said. "I'll work with Brainy and get some future tech and see what I can do,"

"Thank you again!" Kara said happily.

"I'll text you when it's ready," he said. 

Kara nodded, then left the DEO. She flew back to her own apartment, and got lost deep in her own thoughts. What would she wear tonight? Obviously she couldn't wear her super suit, because that would defeat the purpose of her trying to impress Lena. But she also couldn't wear something that she had ever worn as Kara. It had to be something original. She looked through her closet, trying to find something that would work. 

Kara was snapped back into reality when she heard a knock at her door. Before opening it, she used her super vision to see who it was. Kara did the exact same thing Alex had done in their conversation earlier, and choked on her own spit. On the other side of the door, was the woman whom Kara had spent the last two nights with.

"Kara?" Lena asked, knocking again. "It's me,"

"I, uh," Kara hesitated. "Coming!" She finally yelled. She ran to the door and opened it,

"I've missed you," Lena said, hugging her. Kara loved the familiar warmth of Lena's hugs, but it felt different this time. She wasn't sure if the hug was different because of what happened with Lena and Supergirl, or if it was just her imagination.

"I've missed you too," Kara replied. "I haven't seen you since Alex's party," Lena chuckled to herself,

"I've got so much to tell you since then," she said, grinning. Kara made a fake shocked face, hoping Lena would fall for it. 

"What could have possibly happened in two days?" Kara asked, laughing.

"Well, uh," Lena hesitated. She thought for a minute, would Zorel really be okay with her telling Kara about them? As much as she wanted to tell her best friend everything, something in her told her that it would be wrong. 

"I've got a date tonight," Lena said, not mentioning anything about Supergirl. She had to admit, that it felt good to say that without being in love with her best friend anymore. Sure, it had only been two days, but how long could she really wait for Kara when she had someone else who she had spent the last two nights with? Which had been amazing, by the way. 

"A date?" Kara asked, raising her eyebrows. "With who?" 

"A mystery person, you could say," Lena replied.

"Intriguing," Kara said. "Do I know him?" Lena sighed,

"I don't think you know her," she said, emphasizing the pronoun.

"Oh," Kara replied, intentionally making her voice go high in fake shock. "Tell me more,"

"Well, after Alex's party, I was pretty drunk. So she took me home. And then, we slept together. I sort of thought that would be the end of it, but then she came back again yesterday. And then we did it again. And now she's coming over tonight for a date," Lena explained. 

She smiled to herself, satisfied. She technically didn't lie to Kara for the most part, she just left out some bits of the truth. Sure, she said that she didn't think that she knew her. But Kara probably didn't personally know her, so she wasn't lying that much. And after the date, she would ask Zorel if she could tell Kara about them. After all, she didn't want to lie to her best friend about something like this,

"Wow," Kara said, wide eyed. "So what's she like?" Lena smiled brightly,

"She's amazing, Kara," she replied. "I don't know her that well, but there's just something about her that's special. And I already really really like her,"

"Well," Kara replied, her emotions all over the place. "I'm happy for you." On one hand, Lena was saying all those things about her, which made her happy. But on the other hand, she was happy with Supergirl, not Kara.

"So," Lena said. "What should I wear?"

"Something that brings out your eyes," Kara said, staring into those green pools. Lena nodded,

"I like where you're going with this," she said. Kara gave her a soft smile. Lena looked back at her and returned the smile. For a moment, it felt like everything would be okay. It felt like Lena was in love with Kara, too.

"I think I have the perfect dress for that," Lena said to her. "Thank you for the idea!" Kara felt the pain hit her again, but she smiled through it,

"Of course," she said. "Now you go get your girl."

"I'll tell you all about it tomorrow," Lena replied. She gave Kara a goodbye hug, then walked out through the door. 

Just then, Kara got a text from Winn. He said that her contact lenses and voice changer were ready. She instantly flew back to the DEO to retrieve them,

"Here we are," Winn said. "And the contact lenses can actually be worn for up to 48 hours at a time including sleep. And the voice changer is a piece of tape you put over your throat. It'll blend into your skin instantly."

"Thank you," Kara said, putting in the contacts. Winn handed her a mirror to see how she looked. Her eyes were no longer the light blue shade, but a dark green. Not the same shade as Lena’s, but something that wasn’t that much different from her natural blue eyes. 

“Let’s see how the voice changer works,” Winn suggested. Kara nodded, then put the tape over her throat. The bright white tape faded to her exact skin color so no one could tell that it was there in the first place.

“How do I sound?” Kara asked, then felt her throat, “Wow, thank you, Winn!” Her voice sounded different from how she normally sounded, but not enough to where Lena would be able to tell the difference.

“I should head back now,” she said. He waved goodbye, and off she went. 

At her apartment, she found the perfect dress to wear. She put it on, then flew to Lena’s.

“Zorel?” Lena asked, waiting at her balcony. Kara couldn’t believe the beauty before her eyes,

“Lena,” she said, taking a deep breath. “We need to talk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N look at me, writing while I’m in school, how scandalous. (Auto caps is on for my iPad, so my author’s notes when I’m at school will be like this lol)
> 
> How we feelin’ about the 100th episode?
> 
> Anyway,
> 
> Q: whats your biggest accomplishment?
> 
> A: writing an entire book at the age of 12
> 
> (I really should work to get it published, seeing as it’s been 4 years since I wrote it oops)


	4. The Talk

"Z-Zorel," Lena stuttered, in shock at how good she looked. She was wearing a black and red dress that covered her body perfectly.

"Lena," she said to her. "We need to talk,"

"Of course, come in," Lena invited her. She flew down and landed perfectly on the balcony.

"You look amazing," Lena pointed out. Kara blushed,

"You too," she replied. Not only was she appreciating Lena's dress, but she was obviously using her super vision to appreciate what was underneath.

"So," Lena said. "For tonight's date, we have a few options." She took Kara's hand, then continued,

"If you're comfortable, I can get us into the best restaurant in in all of National City. I don't think anyone would recognize you as Supergirl," she said. Kara opened her mouth to reply, but Lena cut her off before she could say anything,

"And if you're not comfortable with that, then I can can still order in something for us to eat here," she continued. Kara thought for a minute,

"Let's go out," she said. Lena gave her a sincere smile. She disconnected their hands so she could get her phone out,

"Siri," she said, holding the iPhone close to her face. "Text Jess and tell her to make reservations at the nicest place in all of National City. Also tell her to have my chauffeur here." Kara chuckled,

"I can just fly us there," she offered.

"No," Lena said abruptly. "You're dressed normally for a reason. Tonight, you don't have to be Supergirl. Tonight, it can be just the two of us,"

"I'd love that," Kara replied. Lena smiled brightly, then cupped Kara's cheeks in her arms. She stared deep into the alien's eyes, then looked away in confusion.

"Your eyes look different," she pointed out. Kara panicked, and felt her heart racing. What was she supposed to do? Winn was supposed to make the contact lenses different from her normal eyes, but close enough to where Lena wouldn't be able to tell,

"What are you talking about?" Kara asked, feeling her face turn red.

"I remember the first night after Alex's birthday party that we..." Lena then gestured to both of their bodies. "I looked clear into your eyes. I remember clearly that they were a light blue, almost like the ocean and sky had come together."

"Nope," Kara lied, feeling her breathing get faster. "I've always had green eyes,"

"Are you sure?" Lena asked, then added. "Well, of course you know your own body, but I could have sworn your eyes were the most beautiful shade of blue. Of course they're still beautiful now, but I remember them differently." Kara thought of a lie.

"What I meant to say," she said in a squeaky voice. "Was that my eyes have always been green most of my life. It's a Kryptonian thing for our eyes to change color. Mine are just almost always green, but every now and then they'll be blue. I just must not have noticed the change." Just another lie to add on to the mountain of lies she already told to the woman she loved.

"Really?" Lena asked. "You've never mentioned anything like that before in interviews... neither has your cousin,"

"I just usually don't feel a need to mention it, since mine rarely ever change," Kara lied.

"I've read something about the science of changing eye colors. It's because the iris has an allergic reaction. Similar to how someone can get hives when they're around something that they're allergic to, except the iris changes color as its reaction!" Lena said, excited about the science of it all. Kara acted like she was in thought for a moment,

"I never really thought about the science behind it, but I guess it makes sense now," she said, chuckling.

"It's so fascinating how the biology of your body has some of the same aspects as human biology!" Lena replied, totally geeking out. Kara was relieved that there was always some sort of scientific explanation to everything. And luckily for her, Lena knew all those scientific explanations. Just then, Lena's phone chimed.

"The car is here," she said, then extended her arm out. "Are you ready?" 

"I'm ready," Kara replied, happily taking her lover's arm. Together, they walked out of Lena's apartment. While walking down the steps, Kara pointed up toward the sky,

"It's a full moon," she said, whispering into Lena's ear. Her voice sent chills all throughout her body.

"It's beautiful," Lena replied back in a whisper. Kara wanted nothing more than to press her lips against Lena's and kiss her in the moonlight. But alas, the car was waiting for them and they had to go.

"Miss Luthor," the driver greeted them.

"Hello," she replied to him. She opened the back door and motioned for Kara to get in.

"After you," she said.

"No," Kara argued. "After you,"

"Zorel, I am the one taking you out. So I insist, after you," Lena snapped back. Kara sighed, then finally decided to get in. Lena may have won this battle, but the war was not over. Lena smirked, then got in after her.

"Did Jess tell you the place?" Lena asked the driver. He nodded,

"She did," he said. 

"Good," Lena replied. 

He pulled up the thing that divided the front from the back, so he could give the girls some privacy.

"So..." Kara said awkwardly. "How's it goin'?" Lena couldn't help but laugh at how innocent she sounded when she said that.

"Pretty good," she replied, still laughing. "Definitely happy right now,"

"How come?" Kara asked innocently. 

"Because I'm with you," Lena replied. Kara felt her heart melt. 

"Let me kiss you already," she said sternly. 

Neither of them hesitated as their lips came crashing together. Kara ran her hands through Lena's hair as her tongue explored even farther into her mouth. Lena brought her knee up and attempted to press it against the alien's crotch, since both of her hands were wrapped around her.

"Don't ruin," Kara said between kisses. "The dress,"

"Fuck the dress," Lena replied. "I can buy you a new one. I'm literally a billionaire." Kara pulled away,

"But I like this one," she said in a whiny voice. Lena raised her eyebrows, looking at her pouty face. 

"Y'know," she said, thinking out loud. "You remind me of someone." This time, Kara raised her eyebrow,

"Who?" She asked.

"My best friend, Kara," Lena said. Kara had to stop herself from choking on her own spit.

"Uh," she hesitated.

"Yeah, you guys both just have the innocent energy to you," Lena said to her.

"That's not what you said in bed the last two nights," Kara mumbled. Lena looked at her blankly, blinked a few times, then looked straight forward.

"What?" Kara asked. Lena looked at sure, unsure what to say. Kara continued on,

"Guess I'm not as much like this Kara as you thought," she said. Lena thought for a minute,

"Yeah," she agreed. "Kara could never do what you did in bed." Kara internally smirked.

"Miss Luthor," the driver said, pulling down the divider. "We have arrived."

"Thank you," she said to him. She opened the door, and the two girls got out of the car. 

"Here we are," Lena said, taking her hand. Kara smiled at her. Together, they walked into the expensive and fancy restaurant.

"Hello ladies," the waiter said to them. Lena gave him a quick nod.

"Do you have any requests for seating?" He asked them. 

"We'd like rooftop seating please," she replied. 

"Right this way," he said, leading them near the back of the restaurant. He opened a door that led to a flight of stairs. The three of them walked up until they reached the top. 

"Here we are, ladies," he said, leading them to a table.

"Thank you so much," Lena replied. He set down the menus, then went back downstairs.

"Lena," Kara said. "Why are we the only ones up here?"

"Because it costs extra to sit up here," she explained. Kara frowned,

"You don't need to spend that much money on me, Lena," she said.

"Zorel, I'm literally a billionaire. I don't mind spending money," Lena told her. 

"Alright," Kara replied, still not wanting Lena to have to spend that much on her.

"I kind of like it though," Lena said. "We have the whole rooftop to ourselves."

"That is pretty nice," Kara admitted. After they had a few minutes to themselves, the waiter returned.

"What can I get started off to drink for you ladies?" He asked.

"I'll have some red wine," Lena replied.

"Can I have a Dr. Pepper?" Kara asked. The waiter looked at her a little weird, but still wrote it down. He walked back downstairs to get their drinks ready.

"I wonder if they have pizza here," Kara mumbled, flipping through the menu. Unfortunately, they did not. They didn't have potstickers either. So she settled on spaghetti. 

"Have you ladies decided on your order, or do you need a little more time?" The waiter asked them as he brought their drinks.

"I think we're ready," Lena said. He got out his notebook,

"I will take the lobster with a side of kale," Lena said to him. He nodded, writing it down.

"I'll have spaghetti with no mushrooms," Kara replied. 

"Your food should be ready in about 15-20 minutes," he told them, walking back down. Kara took a sip of her drink, then smiled at Lena across from her.

"So," Lena said. "When you came over, you said you wanted to talk."

"Yes," Kara replied, suddenly remembering. "I think it's necessary for us to talk about... whatever this is." She gestured to her body and then to Lena's. 

"Okay," Lena said, taking a sip of her wine.

"I like you Lena, a lot," Kara told her. 

"And I like you a lot, Zorel," Lena replied.

"So what exactly is our relationship then?" Kara asked. Lena thought for a minute, then answered.

"I'd like you to be my girlfriend," she said. Kara felt her heart soar.

"Really?" She asked, smiling like a puppy. 

"Really," Lena replied.

"Well, I'd like you to be my girlfriend too," she said in a more serious tone.

"Good," Lena replied, grinning.

"Happy anniversary," Kara told her, giggling. 

"Happy anniversary, Zorel," Lena replied. They both leaned in for a kiss. Their lips were about to touch until they were interrupted.

"Ahem," the waiter cleared his throat. "We were able to get your food out early tonight," 

"Ah," Lena said, blushing. "Thank you," he said nothing, then practically ran down the stairs. 

"Well that was awkward to say the least," Lena said as she turned back around to face her girlfriend, who already had a mouthful of spaghetti in her mouth. Lena opened her eyes wide, and took a delicate bite into her food. Meanwhile, Kara swallowed the bite of spaghetti and was chewing on a whole meatball. 

"I wanted to talk to you about something too," Lena told her. 

"Okay," Kara said after she finally swallowed.

"My best friend, who I told you about earlier tonight," Lena started. "I'd like to tell her about our relationship." Kara wasn't sure what to say,

"Alright," she finally said. Lena sighed in relief,

"Thank you!" She said. "It's just that she's my best friend and I wouldn't want to lie to her about something as big as this." Kara felt her heart sink. She felt terrible that Lena wanted to keep Kara in the loop about everything, while she was literally another person and Lena didn't know.

"I've already told her that I'm dating someone, but she doesn't know that I'm dating Supergirl. And that I'm dating you..." Lena said.

"Well, if she's your best friend. Of course you can tell her. But I wouldn't want anyone else knowing. Because if one of my enemies find out that you're with me, then they might hurt you and use you. And if something bad happened to you because of that, I would never forgive myself." Kara told her. Lena sighed,

"I understand. I'll make sure she doesn't tell anyone else." She said.

"Thank you," Kara replied, then sighed in relief. 

"So..." Lena began. "Now that we're together, I'd still like to get to know more about you. I still want to get to know who you are when you're not Supergirl."

"Okay," Kara agreed. "Ask away."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N this author's note is gonna be much more serious. and also fyi, this fanfic is posted on both wattpad and ao3, so if you don't see any comments or anything regarding what i'm talking about, just know that's probably the reason.
> 
> ok, so i've gotten a few comments that have really been kind of... ugh
> 
> the description of this story literally says that lena is going to be with supergirl, not knowing that she's kara. so if you think that it's dumb and stupid that this is happening, read another fanfic then. i want at least 100,000 words for this, so obviously i need a story. 
> 
> and also, i've gotten comments(not just on this story) that have literally been from grown ass adults degrading my writing. please know, that i am a 16 year old girl just trying to live my life. 
> 
> so, that's pretty much it. of course i still love the nice comments! (please don't have this stop you from commenting nice things! nice comments are literally my favorite part of being a fanfic writer) but yeah, i just needed to get that out.
> 
> Q: what's the most rebellious/worst thing you've ever done?
> 
> A: returned a library book late


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